I fulfilled my dream of homeownership six years ago. After the initial joy and pride wore off I was faced with the same problems every other homeowner deals with – maintenance. I don’t mind the grass cutting so much- I do have a teenage son for that. It’s all the other little annoyances that are really starting to get on my nerves. Toilet issues, backed up pipes, water pressure issues, bug problems, leaky roof, draft windows, handprints on the walls…the list goes on and on.

I just had to replace my roof about a month ago although the seller six years ago assured me it was a brand-new roof. He lied, oh the shock! He didn’t even use underlayment and the subsequent leaks had me scrambling for a contractor that was honest, hardworking and reasonable. It took me three months to find someone! Most of the guys that showed up at my house were quite evidently members of the good ol’ boy network as the Southern drawl and repeated “hun” and “Ma’am” sprinkled conversation showed. That I could’ve put up with (gritting my teeth of course); it was the abhorrent estimates I was getting. They fluctuated wildly and the differences were several thousand dollars. Now, I don’t have the word sucker stamped on my forehead but they saw a single woman and thought, “Wooohooo, doesn’t-know-a-thing-lets-get-her”. Really, some of the explanations were downright condescending and I am not about to hire you if you elude that you think I have an IQ of 60. I ended up hiring a friend of a co-worker and he did a great job; reasonable price too.

Now I have to address the plumbing issue. Backed up pipes, broken hot water handle in the tub – you get the picture. I have been taking showers with a vice grip for a hot water handle for oh, probably 9 months. Who can afford a damn plumber anymore? It’s getting ridiculous. The flat-pricing, the exorbitant mark-ups on the PVC pipes and supplies, the service charges; it just makes me ill. Until I find a guy (or girl) that won’t try to rip me off, vice grip it is. It’s so white trash but who cares?

I am reasonably adept at fixing minor things around the house, own a decently stocked toolbox and can put furniture together without assistance; however, I am no plumber, electrician or any sort of handy-woman whatsoever. So my long-term independence has put me in a position where I no longer have a live in handyman and I’m stuck having to pay hundreds or thousands of dollars to get crap fixed. Sometimes I wish I could just pack all my shit and move. Ha! The perils of homeownership, folks should get a medal for putting up with the money pits.